10 Ejaculates and a Good Centrifuge.

"Go around and pee on home plate!"

There is a mediocre HBO show called Hung, in which the premise of a recent episode was the main character's son peeing on home plate, or as they called it, "defiling the baseball diamond". At first I was confused about the motivation and the big deal. Until the opening comment was uttered to me last night. I guess I wasn't drunk enough to fully appreciate it, but being on a field, the sprinklers going on, a small crowd cheering you on behind you - there's a little bit of je ne sais quoi quality about it which makes it a little bit ridiculous.

Of course, although not drunk, there needed to be quite a bit of alcohol consumption for the event to occur. And with that, my supervisor, my coworker and I had a long discussion about anything that came to mind. Lots of praises flew around, although one particular praise went on about 30 odd times in the night, with at least once where it was mentioned 3 times in a row. Quite a few insults flew too, but this time it doesn't seem like toxic environment causing - everything was honest, with supports, and not meant to be malicious towards the objects.

The talk repeated a lot of things over and over, I mean, we were quite drunk at that point. However, it seems to tell me that I could go to grad school if I want to. Of course, this doesn't actually tell me that much - before there were the three thoughts: a- want to do BEd, b- do i want to do MSc? and c- can I do MSc? Although c is somewhat eliminated, it was never really that far away from b.

I'm going to really miss my supervisor when I leave. Last night was filled with fun, even without the alcohol.

You are the 6000th visitor

Today when I plopped in my sample for mass spectrometry, the computer showed that I was the 6000th sample from my lab. Artificial fireworks flew across my screen, before real life sparklers going off beside the monitor, and the mass spectrometer playing a happy diddly. The technician comes by with a miniature cupcake with "Happy 6000th" icing and a blue candle.

....

Not really.

The machine just asked me for my sample name and expected mass. It was very anti-climatic in actuality. That's what happens when a special date or milestone was over-emphasized for ages, only to disappoint with mediocrity.

But then, why can't mediocrity be enough? Why do we strive for extraordinary things when the simple things in life pass us by without so much as a thought, much less the appreciation they deserves? Why can't we be happy that it's raining in the middle of summer? Or be excited that when we take out our pencil, and it's still sharpened? Why do we hold parades for all sorts of frivolous things, when we could be celebrating the fact that our breaths don't stink because of that pack of gum we found at the bottom of the couch cushion?

Growth of a noun

Ask a 12 years old what he or she think a scientist working in a lab looks like. The response might be lab coats or goggles, or swirling an Erlenmeyer. That basically rules out all the mathematicians and let's not even bring up the social scientists. As they grow, their definition of scientist might morph and mature until it becomes a definition they're willing to stick with.

Cab ride in the rain

I'd like to think I'm not quite yet at the level to deserve the title of scientist, but frankly, I might be close. Two years ago, I would looked at myself funny if I saw my google search left with inquiries such as "palladium-assisted indolinimide hydrolysis" and "quenching LDA reactions of acid-sensitive moiety".

Kahlua baked in cheesecake

Sure, the latter one might be just because moiety is one of those awesome words of vowel-tasticness, but I wouldn't even know how to use half of those words a while ago.

I've always said that I'm not defined by not definition, or at least that's what it says on my Facebook profile. I will make the scientist I'll be; Science will not define me. I'm not going to be a spandex- and cape-wearing B Man; Justin's gonna be throwing down with the rod of democracy.

Velvet flutter of skirts

It really is going to be business as usual next year. The amount of cancellations and negotiations that I have to deal with is mind numbing. Not to mention the budget's an utter mess.

Blood-letting and leeches

Not that there's a lot of hours that needs to be put in, but the amount of random worrying is starting to catch up to me, and my thoughts are starting to get scattered. It makes writing in this blog really difficult, since in writing of this blog post, I've wanted to change the topic 4 times. My thoughts don't get developed fully any more, so it looks like a chicken scratch of notes.

Simple full layouts

So blog posts will probably start again with a little bit more gusto, now that I have someone to write for.

Drummer

"A magnificent specimen, like a lone wolf - uncertain whether by circumstance or by choice. In either case, there exists no better lifestyle for him."

Home

"I'm going to the place where love and feeling good don't ever cost a thing."
Daughtry - Home

Home is where your heart is.

Yeah, sure I guess.

If that's the case, recently my home's been all over the place.

Home right now is really no more than a place to pass out after work. Sure, it's still my preferred place of passing out, but still.

Things used to be simple; a house is not a home did not apply, the two are the same. The house you lived in is your home.

Following your heart, getting it attached to something and grounding yourself, that's how we get ourselves through life.

For a while, home was a time. 6:45am. It was like the ultimate me time.

Associated with that time, there were two locations.

There was a little alcove opposite of the band room with a wooden bench. It's small enough that even in the fetal position, it's still cozy, yet it's big enough for me to be able to stretch out and lie there. It's an amalgamation of drywall, wood, and cement. The drywall brittle, the wood smooth, and the cement, filled with the marks of all the others who have enjoyed the little bit of safe haven.

The other was the gym. One light on out of the 12. The 800 people capacity facility, for 10 minutes is reserved only for me. I can choose to set up, I can choose to warm up, or I can choose to sit down, and accompany the 800 people worth of me.

6:45am was a magical time for me.

Come university, two more places are added, Chemistry, and Ladha.

I am doubting how homely Chemistry feels. My heart is flip flopping. I don't know if I want to treat it that way. It's not like a hospital residency, where getting in basically means devoting into it entirely. I am not bound by anyone but me to the 5 years I'm stuck in this place. All my heart needs to do is flutter, and I can be out of here.

Ladha is very similar. Although it's a lot more of a home is where my feet are situation. I'm there, almost always, so everyone teases that it is home. Pretty soon I would start believing it.

I just want to go home.

To Boris

Practice yesterday went well. Originally planned to practice today, then mom decided that she wants to play Mahjong. Mother's day means I get trumped.

Virtual Love Letter

I have always believed that writing a reference letter is similar to writing a love letter. You praise and brag about how wonderful this person is, and overlook all their flaws. Your language changes from daily speech, to a more flowery prose.

The more substantial proof is in the writing process. You start off by picturing their face; regardless of how they look, you start attributing their positive traits onto their physical feature. The eternally optimistic person will have their smile etched, and the corners of their eyes wrinkled, the sports enthusiast will have a trim physique, minimizing the body fat content, the perpetual green thumb will have that adorable streak of dirt across their forehead, and a slightly messy hair. Then the visualization comes to life. The modest kid shows a quiet inflection in his speech. The emotionally expressive person would be offering a hug. The homely would smell of fresh baking.

A good and truthful reference always gets better at the end. The process of writing builds this person up, which just further motivates you to write a reference that is worth such an amazing person. The ultimate test really is to finish writing the letter and meet up with this person, and not be disappointed. Sometimes we just build someone up so high that even the most perfect of men would fail to meet our standards.

The man I wrote my love letter to met my expectation and then some. =)

Quick update

Obviously I'm busy with school and neglect this thing, but here're a few things happening recently.

- I rolled my ankle playing volleyball again - there is HUGE bruising right now one side is about 3"x1", the other side's 5" x 2". After the swelling went down I can walk pretty decently, as long as I'm on flat ground.

- Just desserts' this Thursday. I get to walk up, get a plaque, then eat a whole bunch of dessert, it'll be sweet. Literally.

- I get to plan an operation =D I love those, I am starting that up with my committee next year (knock on wood)

- I'll be in a lab in UBC this summer. yay nserc. (yet to decide if the second part's sarcastic or not)

lala

So Boris doesn't bore.

School Politics BAD

So I've been wanting 2 uncontested people to lose in the elections happening right now for very different reasons.

One of them I like and have great respect for, but just isn't working as hard as he needs to. He is running against a "joke candidate" and he would get the position regardless. I want him to lose so he can finally realize he needs to step up a bit in terms of doing outreach work - he would be amazing in the position, but it's easy for him to not get the position.

The other I just want to lose. Not that she wouldn't be better than the current person holding the position, but she doesn't do follow up, and even hassled multiple times, nothing gets done.

Justin fails at preparing stuff

Options:

Analytical
Organic x2
Physical
Inorganic

Getting yourself out there:
Coop
Volunteer
Get a job
NSERC

Questions?

So Sure of Himself

Depending on who you ask, I am either a cocky bastard or someone who's scared shitless. I tend to believe that I'm an insecure version of the latter, so I pretended to be the former. For these last days of the Olympics before school starts, I figure it'd be a good time to start reflecting upon things I done, those that I haven't, and everything in between. (Everything before this basically means that Boris is too needy (probably because he's a true musician) ).

The first of the series will be things that I've never doubted. Of course, none of these lists will be exhaustive, but hopefully they will be a good mix in all of these.

In kindergarten, an eighth of my middle finger got cut off in a door. Lots of hoopla happened, at the school and at the emergency room. Fast forward a week later, during my first of many checkups, the doctor told me that it's unlikely that I will ever get full usage out of my middle finger. Everyone started worrying for me, but to the doctor I said
""
And as the picture proves, I was right.

In grade 7, when we were all "graduating" from elementary, there was this thing called the citizenship awards. It was only a few years young, and there were no real criteria for it. I remember about 4 days before, and I already *know* I won it. At this point, I had no idea that my friends (and others) all voted for me. Why? I was merely acquaintances with them at that point.
" "

The thing with these awards is that the more you get, the more you expect them. Had you told me that I wasn't likely to get my Spanish awards, I'd laugh in your face. It's funny when people got confused when they didn't win it. In my last 3 Spanish courses, I probably averaged a grade of 97. During my grade 12 year, I had a total of 14 marks off in the year, out of close to a thousand, and that didn't even include my bonus marks.

With that kinda grade back then, it seemed self evident why I didn't bother applying to "backup" schools. UBC was the lowest ranked school to which I applied. None of that "maybe you should apply for a college like Langara or Kwantlen" or "SFU" bullshit. And at the end, I didn't even completely apply to all the other schools.

Of course, more blatantly, was the stunt I pulled for my speech for treasurer candidacy.
" "
No, that seriously was it, I turned sideways.

A lot of these seem extremely silly now. Especially the last one, where I could've at least made a speech. UBC could've kicked my ass and not accept me, and I'd be left universityless (well, not really).

Lets see where this post would lead to next.

A Cellphone that a Hooker Won't Use

So it's official; my cellphone is dead. It went through the wash and will no longer function. Even the metal casing came off from all the blowdrying SOS I've tried performing.

So now onto another phone, and the need to regather phone numbers again (I've learnt my lesson and now my contact list saves on my sim card now).

So this has been a pretty bad series of events, but the good thing to come of it is that I get to make a PSA =) If you have old (functioning) cell phones that you no longer need, you can get it through charities to sex workers, as all emergency numbers function without a sim card =D

So I've started all these paragraphs with so's. I just want to point out that I noticed.

I'm done

Of sorts.

10 things you don't understand about Justin

So I've caught a few of those x things you didn't know about y, and I realized I must have done quite a few of those lists throughout the years. One of those things is definitely me talking about things that only I understand. Instead of explaining them, I thought I'll just throw a bunch more out there!

1. I hope the choking didn't leave much of a mark, physical or otherwise. Sure it might be an impressive thing to be able to tell your many many future kids, but hopefully nothing bad happens to you again <3

2. I'd love to go watch skating with you, if that's what we're doing.

3. You're the person I'd be if I didn't love myself as much.

4. I wish I can love myself as much as you do you, and in fact, you do me even.

5. I'm not doing a good deed, I'm just waiting for the curse to pass.

6. I'm annoyed that you guys pass on me, I'm pissed of the guys you did pick.

7. I need manilla. Vanilla. maybe a lil' bit of quesadilla.

8. Black (blue) is the colour (of my true love's hair (eyes)).

9. I feel like we're drifting, which makes me sad, but looking back, it's incredible we got together at all.

10. Imma put a big smile for a while. Nobody gots to know.